Lighting The Shadow – A Men’s Rite of Passage Wilderness Weekend

The Importance of Rites of Passage

There is an African saying, “If you don’t show a young man the heat he will burn down the village.”

While this speaks more to rites of passage for young men, it is still relevant as it speaks to the importance of community during transitions in men’s lives. Young men who are not shown their ‘edge’ in a healthy way, will often create their own forms of initiation by forming gangs, or taking unhealthy risks.

Many adult men did not experience any ‘initiation’ and had to find their own way. Often in the absence of clear examples of what ‘healthy masculinity’ can look like.

Of course, adulthood provides a number of natural initiations for many men including becoming a father. However, these are not always well supported, or guided and we have to make it up for ourselves since we no longer live in tribes with elders, brothers and uncles showing us the way, or sharing the load. Often we get lost along the way, and simply do what is needed to survive.

It’s time we put an end to that. It’s time to thrive, and it’s time to come together as men for mutually supportive transitions through life. That’s what Lighting The Shadow is about.

What kind of workshops are there and where is this held?

We will go on an experiential journey together in a beautiful, yet rugged natural landscape. Professionally facilitated by a highly experienced team of men in a remote and private wilderness property. The location is around a 2 hour drive from the Gold Coast, or 90 minutes inland from Brisbane.

We will experience a variety of workshops and processes involving sharing circles, deep self-inquiry, ‘breath-work’, ‘cold exposure’, and other modalities.

Our ‘self-inquiry’ is set around a theme of ‘The Ego’ or the ‘Shadow Self’ and is designed to help men to tap into the innate wisdom which they already have.

The Importance of self-enquiry

You may have heard quotes relating to, “Know thyself”.

Here are a few of them:

“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom” – Aristotle

“Knowing others is intelligence, knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength. Mastering yourself is true power.” – Lao Tzu

“Do thine own work, and know thyself” – Plato

Our crew’s combined experience of many years of doing our own ‘inner work’ tells us that if we do not examine the feelings and rea-sons behind our own behaviours and experiences of life, we will forever be condemned to a life of either numbness, or uncontrolled over-reactivity to normal situations and emotions. Or both!

Our crew are not gurus. We are normal men, who have all experi-enced our own challenges and have benefited from experiences like this event.

Our mission is to share what has worked for us, because we know just how beneficial such exploration and support can be. We have felt all manner of human experiences. Numbness, being out of control, confused, depressed, anxious and all things in between. We still do experience such challenges at times, but knowledge of self and a great support network helps us to find our way out quicker. We want to offer that to you.

We offer this experience and mentorship outside amongst nature, to help to shine a gentle light onto your blind spots, with a group of supportive men.

What’s the benefit of seeing ‘blind-spots?’

Only when you can see your own blind spots can you have sover-eignty over them. Awareness of such can lead to greater mastery of your life and therefore a greater connection to yourself and to your family.

It is our experience that knowledge of the self and then integration, and acceptance of the troubled parts of us, enables the ability to serve oneself fully, as well as to serve others fully.

What exactly is ‘The Ego’

The ‘Ego’ is an intelligent design which is put in place psychologi-cally when we are young children. It is designed to take protect us from painful emotions, which the immature self is not able to fully feel. The 6 year old ‘boy self’ may prefer to judge another person as wrong rather than feel shame for example. This is called ‘pro-jection’.

In ‘ego work’, or ‘shadow work’ it is the job of the mature adult to recognise their own ‘ego patterns’ of behaviour, and then come to accept that part of themselves. Often these behaviours are unseen by the self since the ‘ego’ can be very cunning and deceptive.

From awareness and acceptance, presence and responsiveness is possible instead of projection onto others and reactiveness.

The concept is that these shadows will almost always be there, in some form or other. They just get smaller, less hidden and less destructive.

What’s the point?

Once seen, the ego cannot be unseen! A less reactive and more responsive, graceful and purposeful life is the likely result of such self-inquiry.

Your own awareness and acceptance of your shadow can lead to transformation and growth. Almost every superhero has a dark and a light side. It is often the case that from their darkness, came their light, or their superpower.

We will encourage you to discover those superpowers within you…. But you need to see your own ‘blind spots’ first. From the darkness there can only be light. We invite you to join us at ‘Shad-ow Light’.

‘Lighting The Shadow’ Men’s Wilderness Event at a Glance:

• Facilitated workshops by an experienced team
• Facilitated workshops by an experienced team
• Self-enquiry, breath work, cold exposure and other work-shops themed around ‘The Ego’ or ‘The Shadow Self’
• All-inclusive residential retreat
• Spend time in nature in a group setting

Included:

• All workshops
• Day 1 lunch – Arrival is at 11:00am
  • Day 1 dinner
• Day 2 breakfast, lunch and dinner
• Day 3 breakfast – Checkout is 4pm
• Accommodation in a bunkhouse – dormitory style
• 4×4 pick up at the meeting point outside The Hollow Log Country Retreat, 878 Mount Byron Road, Mount Byron, QLD 4312
• Zoom session with the other attendees and some of our team 1 week before the retreat.
• Zoom group reunion 1 week after the event
• In person reunion meet-up 2-3 weeks after the event, held in Northern NSW
• Invitation to join our ‘ongoing support community’

Not included:

• Transfers to and from the meeting point at The Hollow Log Country Retreat – 878 Mount Byron Road, Mount Byron, QLD 4312 • Transfers to and from the meeting point at The Hollow Log Country Retreat – 878 Mount Byron Road, Mount Byron, QLD 4312

Who should come

• Your main goal is to gain insights and ‘self-awareness’ during workshops.
• You have a reasonable level of fitness so can walk up a flight of stairs without being out of breath.
• Not suitable for those with serious health conditions who require proximity to medical care as we will be in a wilderness environment at least 1 hour from emergency care.
• You identify as a man and you are comfortable sleeping on beds in a large dormitory style tent facility with other men.
• You are age 25 or older

This retreat has limited spaces for 14 participants.

If you have an existing men’s group it can be arranged as a private event for your group providing you have 10 or more attendees.

If you cannot afford this event please email us at the contact page.

These events are not about making a profit for us. We are more interested in helping people. So please reach out. We are able to provide a number of ‘assisted places’ for each of our events.